This post is brought to you courtesy of Shelby (and it is also being written on my phone, so it might be full of typos)
So this morning when Shelby decided it would be a good plan to poop on my foot while I was brushing my teeth, I seriously got to wondering. What the hell are these little cretons thinking? I mean seriously, seriously? What is going through her mind to make that seem like a good idea?
I pondered and I watched, and I came up with a list of thoughts which I believe make up some of what comprises puppy logic:
1. Why would I get my feet wet and cold outside when I could poop inside in the warm house with the nice, soft carpet?
2. Why would I waste the energy to get up and walk all the way to the other room to get a toy when I could just chew on this table leg right here?
3. Why would I walk up and down the steps when you will just carry me?
4. Why would I settle for just first breakfast when I can walk to the other dog’s bowl and have second breakfast?
5. Maybe they can’t hear me. I will bark louder.
6. Maybe if I destroy everything they like they will like me more.
7. Why would I settle for my toys when I can have ALL the toys?
8. Why would I leave your side when I could just poop on your feet?
You don’t mind, do you? I’m cute and fluffy, and I make little puppy grunts and lick your face when you pick me up. But don’t forget – everything is MINE!
Feel free to add your puppy’s logic in the comment section below!